Where in the World is Valerie?

When FOX started displaying a report from TMZ that Michael Jackson was dead, I didn't fully accept it. This may reflect on the questionable reliability of a gossip website, but I think it goes a little deeper. The sudden death of an iconic global figure (well, has-been icon) attempting a comeback is a classic, almost textbook, tragedy. That pill-popping may have been a factor should shock no one where MJ is concerned with everything else in his past. Regardless of his personal struggles and eccentricities, there is no denying his tremendous contribution to popular culture and music. Michael Jackson represents the 1980's and America at its best - exuberance, creativity, success, hope for a better world - and worst (overextravagance, hubris, commercialism, crotch grabbing, body dysmorphia).

For me, the timing couldn't have been more cosmic, as I turn thirty in four days. Additional coincidence is that I plan to go out for some 80's dancing on Saturday. Growing up, I spent hours singing along to Thriller on my Fisher Price record player, starting songs over if I didn't get all the lyrics right. My mom had a hard time tearing me away from "break dancing" to his hits on my babysitter's living room carpet. I still remember watching the video premiere of Bad on network television with my next-door neighbor. Michael's death carries a symbolic passing away of my childhood, a marker that I really am not a kid anymore. No longer can I blame actions on being young and stupid. Yes, people are cushioning the blow of aging by declaring that thirty is the new twenty. In my opinion, it's just rationalization for shirking personal responsibility and perpetuating emotional immaturity. Then again, I don't believe that you can't trust anyone over thirty.

So goodbye, childhood. Bring on thirty, as well as the inevitable VH1Classic lovefest of MJ tribute music videos on repeat.

WE is having a Bridezillas marathon today. These women are snarky, obnoxious biatches. And most of them are morbidly obese. I have absolutely no desire to throw away that much money, piss off everyone around me, and lose sanity over one day. Yecch

It's my yearly trip to Palm Beach to visit the aunt and uncle. Yet another trip where I do pretty much nothing, which is just fine. However, I did go on two runs, one five-miler on the beach (look out for washed-up man-o-wars!) and one six mile run/walk. The amusement this trip was getting hit on by a 70-something divorcee from easter Europe. Guess I still look hot in a string bikini.

I need to get the hell out of New York for an extended period of time, preferably somewhere with better weather...

I'd love to figure out which building this started in. You may become very meditative watching the plane land - this is normal.


Flying from Sam Fuller on Vimeo.

Easter is here, although from this chilly weather you wouldn't know it. To unleash my creativity, I learned how to decorate eggs the Ukrainian way, known as pysanky. It's not that easy, it takes a steady hand and some knowledge of folk art and symbolism. Since DailyCandy's mailing didn't indicate reservations were required, we almost were not able to get a seat at the Spacecraft class, but it was worth the wait and tension. I don't know if M enjoyed it as much as I did, but I'd definitely trek down to E 7th St to get the supplies needed to make them again. The traditional designs are beautiful, but even more contemporary designs are fun as well.

Fort Greene as some awesome places to discover. I like the laidback vibe but minimal hipster invasion (so far). It's a perfect nabe to hang out with friends and throw a few back. Brooklyn Public House is a perfect example of this. Good beer selection, chill ambience, even though I can't comment on the food. We almost needed to, though, because we were undernourished and overcharged at Ici right across the road. Some entrees were barely appetizer portions, leaving most of the strapping lads in my party hankering for hamburgers. Plus they overcharged us and it took three passes at the bill to get it right. For all of its "fresh, seasonal, and local" hype, it's not worth the price tag.

This video gets my goat a little, in that I am an alumna of a state school (although my masters is from an endowed college). Granted Keith Olbermann is a pompus douchebag, last time I checked, there was no distinction between the private and state-subsidized colleges in what constitutes the Ivy League. I could care less if Ann Coulter graduated cum laude; she is still a crazy b1tch. Pick on something more substantive to debate.